What do you want to become?

When a simple question gets asked, how many of us can speak for our mind? Surgery is amazing and I would consider surgery as a potential career for the rest of my life but nobody gives a crap to women surgeons! Why should I spend my golden years of learning into something where just because I have a different set of sex organs than a male counterpart make the biggest pitfall in my career?

Half an hour later the chief Cardiac surgeon asks me to double glove my hand. He took my left hand and introduced it into a man chest cavity and I was feeling all the thrust that the human heart produces. It beats like a machine, a fleshy non-mechanical pump which beats 24 hrs a day, 7 days in a week and 365 days in a year.

My Cardio-thoracic rotation may be brief but the past few days have meant so much to me.  Accepting the fact that I would not be practicing or doing what I am being a part of now can be utterly disappointing to a certain extent but if I ever had a patient who had a history of CABG (Coronary Artery Bypass Graft ), I can understand the patient well, I can be more empathetic and I can become a better doctor . At the end of day that’s what we all look forward to isn’t it?

As the days pass and I get to be a part of different surgeries I keep telling myself that even if I don’t see myself as a surgeon, I want to learn so much from what the internship program has to offer. Stitching people up or just applying a band-aid or removing a drain. I want to master in the small tinny things that a basic doctor would know.

It’s hard to find place for feminism in surgery. It’s a chapter that I am pretty much sure every female doctor wishes for and then silently closes it because she has no backup mechanism. If lives are saved by giving medicines instead of doing surgeries than this is what the society and the people that make of it get.
Two more months of looking, feeling and absorbing all that surgery has to offer, making the most of it is what I look forward to. There are different ways of deciding what one wants do after MBBS. There are personal life decisions, there are skills that one would like to harvest and there are those that ask the general population.

“What do you want to become?”

[Feel Free to share your thoughts and options, would love to hear from you all! ]